Moral Grey Scale
Honestly, as I look back at life, I realize that I have inflicted many negative actions and psychological pain against others as well as myself. As I grew, I was very over-reactant and angry toward everyone and everything, even though I was still a good person for some of the time, which contrasted with my angry reputation. I had thoughts of hurting others when they picked on me, since that was a lot, or whenever someone made fun of me because I was shy due to my Autism. At these points in my early life, I was in the Black side, close to the Grey side, but leaning close to the outer Black areas.
As I grew, I realized what I had done, and I began to make attempts to repair loose ends, broken friendships, and patch things up with my family. I have NOT had/done any sexual contact of any kind - (still a Virgin), drank alcohol, done drugs, marijuana, smoking, or 'weed' of any kind/deal drugs/juvenile actions, or have maliciously harmed someone to cripple them impermanently - As my morals are Christian as well, being born again at Five, I was raised in a good household, but my ideals and morals were not very well formed toward how I should have treated others and as I look back on it, I truly regret many of my actions that have given me the image of a person who likes to be mean, or cause trouble and harm to others. As we all make mistakes, I wish that I had only picked up sooner. Since my crossing into the White side, I have striven to change my morale, and shift my attitude to a happier, mature, and much nicer one than I was before. I have finally cast the shell of immaturity, and I must maintain a well mind, for the sake of those around me, and Myself.
- Z
